Who am I

I come on tiptoe when you want me the least

And bury myself in the depths of your spine.

I flow on your skin, fill every crease

Until you’ve become completely mine.

I am the ice cube in your stomach

When you suddenly decide to drink

And the heavy feeling that you tuck in bed when you go to sleep.

You forget me until I grip your heart again –

Laugh and mask it all behind the blinding smile,

I am what makes you doubt whether

You are alive at all.

In your path I put walls to remind you of my presence

And every hour of the day I paint your world in grey

So you can’t possibly ignore my existence

I go right to your weakness and twist your arms behind your back

Stab you with spleen until your facades crack

I am the timeless curse running through your blood

From more you should always choose less

Did you ever deserve anything you had?

Have you ever done anything by choice…

It’s so easy to make you sad

And you don’t even contradict me

I am the helplessness of having a lock without a key

You rave about life when you know very well

The only problem is you being an empty shell

I am what makes you cry

I come to you with every twilight

And you meet me, your very own darkness

Your eternal curse, recurrent sickness

I am what makes you write.